Monday, August 15, 2005

So... I'm sitting here at 2:25 a.m. on a late Sunday night slash early Monday morning. Why, you ask? Do not worry. Of course, I will tell you. I'm not the type of person to type a "why" question and then not give you the answer. That is, unless, of course, I'm being rhetorical, which by the way is a difficult word for me to spell... especially, when it is, 2:29 in the late night slash early morning (and did you think that was too many commas because I think so). Now where was I before I began that long run-on sentence? Ah yes... the answer to why I am sitting here at this late hour. Well... here it is my friends. I'm having some trouble sleeping and instead of waiting it out in bed, trying to convince myself that I'll fall asleep within the next 5 minutes, I decided to get up and blog. Why now? I have no idea. I don't even have a topic in mind. I am topic-less. I have nothing. A dry well. An empty present. Now I'm just talking silly and it is clear that I am very tired. At least dry well is an expression... or did I make that up too? But empty present?... definitely haven't heard that one before. I'm going to incorporate that into my daily speech... although I'm not sure how it should be used. Okay, forget that idea.

I'm going to try my best to stop rambling now and actually say something. What could I talk about? What are you interested in? What do you all want to hear about? I've been super sick for the past week... ehh, you don't want to hear about that. (See look... I'm reading your minds! I have that supernatural ability... bet you never knew that) Hmm... maybe that will interest you... other things I bet you don't know about me. Random things. Yes, I know I tend to be random anyways, but this topic could be fun. Let me explore and see where it leads me.....

Hmm... I bet none of you know that when I was younger I used to go into the woods and sweep (not rake... sweep) all the leaves away at this certain spot... and I'd carve at this dead tree with a plastic knife, determined to make it all the way through to the other side. I wanted to make it like my little secret spot in the woods. I'd go there all the time and sweep the leaves away... and I always hoped that when I came back the leaves would still be cleared and the wind wouldn't have moved them around. Okay, so I was naive... but I bet none of you knew I did that! Sorry... that one was kind of boring. But I like this whole child memory thing... I'm gunna roll with that.

I used to make cakes just to have a food fight. I'd put towels on the floor to avoid making a mess of the house. Don't know if my parents ever knew about that actually... probably not, or they would have been mad about my wasting food. What else.... I've only been in a hospital twice and they were both when I was a baby. One time was when I was just a few months... I had a super high fever or something and they had to give me a shot. Right, so that was a boring reason to be in a hospital. And the other time was because I ran into a radiator. That's right... picture little baby Trisha running and then going straight into a radiator and splitting her head open. I had to get stitches on my forehead and that's the only scar I have. I have fun imagining this one... I just can't imagine running into a radiator hard enough to do that to myself.

Okay, this whole blog thing isn't turning out nearly as fun and exciting and interesting as I was hoping. So far all I got is sweeping, cake, and a radiator. And now I'm thinking about psychology. I warned you I was random.... though this isn't as random as you may think, considering what I just said. My psychology thinking has to do with early memories and why we remember what we do. Isn't it funny when you think back? Picture your earliest memories. Are they really random things that seem to have no significance whatsoever? Because mine definitely are. I mean, I have just a few really early memories... I'm talking from like before age 5 because from 5 on I can remember quite a bit. The earliest I can remember anything is from preschool and I have 3 memories from then. I swear... they are THE most random things ever for me to remember. One is of me lying down on a piece of paper being traced at preschool... like for me to color "myself" in later. I just have this clear image of staring up at the wall, trying to lie still. Does this fit the criteria to be considered random? Yes. Here's another. I remember seeing a girl in my preschool class at Chilis. I didn't know her name and we didn't even wave to each other, nevermind say anything. Yet, I remember which restaurant it was and I can see her face in my mind... she was holding her mom's hand. And the last preschool memory I have is from when I was at a friend's house. Her mom was talking to my mom. And this will sound crazy but I swear, I remember this sooo well. My friend's mom was saying how she was worried because they only have one bathroom in the house and what would they do if any two people in the family are sick at the same time? I don't remember what they were talking about before that statement or after it but I remember the statement itself very well. I was playing with my friend's dollhouse on a turn-table at the time when it was said. Ummm.... question mark!!!! How random are those memories? I don't remember feeling extra emotional in any way at those times... happy, confused, or anything. And yet, I remember them so well. Why on earth are those the only memories I have from before kindergarten? Please tell me your early memories are just as random and I'll feel a bit more comforted.

Wow... my blog kinda went from nowhere, to somewhere boring, to somewhere that's about as thought-provoking as I can get at 3:09 in the morning. And this conclusion is going somewhere great too. And I have the strange feeling that if I go to try to fall asleep again now I won't be able to... even though I can barely remember the last word I typed I'm so tired and even though I kinda already forgot what I'm talking about in this sentence. And the fact that I just actually typed talking as tlkaing first and then fixed it I think kinda proves something that I'm trying to prove here... though I'm not sure what it is. Ummm... I'm tired. yeah. I think I'm gunna try that sleep thing again. Hope it works out.