Monday, April 28, 2008

So it's almost my graduation. THE graduation... cap and gown, entering the real world, you're done with school forever graduation. Well, unless of course graduate school is an option but I'm omitting the possibility of this minor flaw in my statement. As I sit down in my dorm room and think about the last 4 years as well as the remaining 71 years of my life (since I promised myself when I was 8 that I would live to be 92) I can't help but freak-out... smile too, cry a bit... actually I'm mostly excited about what's to come for me so I guess freak-out was a poor first word choice. Sorry about that. But at the same time, it is so sad. I realize I'm speaking the thoughts of every college graduate and there's absolutely no shock value to what I am saying but I don't care. I finally found a home at Wheaton and I couldn't be happier.

I look back at my post on Monday, June 28, 2004... the week of my high school graduation and smile. I hated high school... I don't miss it, never will and that's sad. I'm so happy now though to say that I had a great college experience... everyone needs a time and place in their life where they truly feel like they belong and for me it has been the past four years at Wheaton. It's especially important during the earlier years in one's life, no? Like, if you don't have a positive experience associated with a particular place and the people there before age 25 what a waste of childhood. You can have friends, boyfriends, family.... but to have a home away from home where you're comfortable being yourself and enjoy your experiences there.... I mean, that's important. I'm not being funny. I'm sorry. I think my years in college diminished my comedic thoughts. Not really actually.... that's a lie.... but what do you expect other than reflection when I'm two weeks from the end and the beginning of it all?

I actually started this hoping that some random funny thoughts would come pouring out of me, as usually happens when I start a blog topicless.... I'm a bit disappointed in myself. Oh well. Maybe if I just keep typing something will come to me.... though I do have a meeting in ten minutes and ten minutes isn't very much time to allow the creative process to take over. Speaking of creativity, I had my palm read this weekend. It was amusing. The guy, totally decked out in way too much hippie gear, looked at my palm and was like "WOAH! You're a writer. Right?" and I was like "uhhh...." Well that's a lie actually, I said yes to avoid a situation where he would ask me another question.... we know me with social interactions. Anyways, he's all like "I'm seeing major creativity in you... great imagination, great imagination". So at this point I'm tempted to tell him I'm a math major to see what he says, but I don't. Once again Trisha stifles her thoughts. Then he tells me I'm compassionate and I want to laugh out loud. I'm the most non-outwardly compassionate person I know... people tell me I'm stand-offish. But I keep my serious expression on and nod as he continues talking. He says I'm compassionate to the point where I'll let people walk all over me b/c I have a strong desire to please people... and I was like, okay, well that last bit is true... if that's how he defines compassionate I guess I am. Then he said to me "you're the type of person who when she says "how are you doing today?" you really are genuinely interested in their response" and I was back to wanting to laugh. I hate social conventions like asking people how they are b/c we all know no one really cares and is just being polite. He finished by saying I have a strong sense of relationships and I am mature beyond my years in terms of knowing what love actually is... b/c of my respect for marriage and innate understanding of true love I will have a very successful marriage. Now I realize he probably says this to every girl, but I almost started crying. Then again, I had about 3 liters of wine in me at this point, but.... yeah, my first palm reading experience was an enlightening one. And now it's time for my "meeting" aka math picnic. Look what I accomplished in the last ten minutes!!! A slightly more amusing tale than my original reflection on graduation! I'm a proud woman.